Krizzurp.com Kratom Review

July 02, 2019 Articles, Kratom Products, Kratom Reviews, Kratom Strains, Kratom Tea, Kratom Vendors

I’ve done many odious and hard-to-justify things in my life. I’ve eaten two hits of “Adam” off the sweaty gut of a curiously obese crack whore. I’ve performed makeshift piercings on a stranger while under the influence of some potent OG Kush. Hell, I’ve even gotten so “turnt” that I walked into a church rectory and demanded to know where I could unload my sausage for their annual meat drive (no such festivity existed, of course).

But one thing that I have never dared to mess with is the sizzurp. For those who don’t know, “sizzurp” is a slang term for promethazine and codeine, a dangerous combination of drugs that are often mixed in with a cup of Sprite and a Jolly Rancher candy (for color).

When you’ve lived a life of chemical exploration you learn to cope with some truly hideous scenes, but the drooling, snarling face of a rapper in guttural turmoil is not one of them. In the past, A-list stars like Lil Wayne have copped to a very bad sizzurp addiction, one that apparently landed him in the hospital from an overdose.

Three years later the Daily Beast ran a piece about how excessive consumption of “sizzurp” or “lean” was killing Mr. Back That Azz Up. Of course, that didn’t stop him. After all, getting snuffed out would surely be less painful than what happened whenever Tha Carter tried to stop slurping on the ‘zurp.

As Wayne told MTV News, every time he abstained from the purple drank, it felt “like death in your stomach when you stop…”

In subsequent years we learned that many entertainers have kicked the bucket as a result of sizzurp consumption, perishing from seizures, respiratory depression, etc. These are the reasons why even some crazy bastard like me ain’t about to hit the “lean”.

That being said, we all wanna get turnt sometimes. Enter the folks at Krizzurp.com, a new brand selling something you can slurp without getting all slizzard.

WHO ARE THEY?

Krizzurp.com was founded for one reason and one reason only—to introduce Kratom Coffee to the world. Krizzurp & Co. is an independently owned company operating out of Sedona, Arizona. They specialize in selling plantation fresh kratom powder, liquid extract, kratom capsules, kava powder and other fine herbs.

WHAT HAVE THEY GOT TO OFFER?

Krizzurp.com offers seven different kratom coffee blends. They are as follows: Premium Maeng Da, Gold Vietnam, Red Bali, White Bali, White Sumatra, Red Elephant JongKong and Plantation Maeng Da, respectively.

Each strain is perfect for brewing a rich mug of incredible kratom coffee or tea. Their aromas and nutty taste pair well with almost any creamer or organic honey.

For the real kratom crazies who want to keep up on the latest news, they maintain a Krizz TV channel and what they call The Krizzurp Chronicles.

WHAT’S IT GONNA COST ME?

At $36.21 for 250 grams they are definitely poised to blow their competition out of the water. However, their pricing is a bit confusing. You actually pay more money for fewer grams, so if you only buy 100 grams you’re getting it for $43.71.

Bulk kratom powder is not an option for casual consumers, but it appears as though they deliver larger shipments to smoke shops and the like.

Although they do not offer free samples to new customers, they do provide starter packs for $49.99.

KRIZZURP COUPON CODE

Promo codes are made available upon request for first-time buyers. A Krizzurp.com promo code is good for 15% off when applied at checkout.

SHIPPING & CUSTOMER SERVICE

This vendor offers 1-hour delivery shipping to Los Angeles residents and expedited shipping for all customers. Packages typically arrive within 2-3 business days, although you can pay extra to get it sooner.

Unlike many other sites they actually offer a 24/7 live chat option for contacting them with questions. However, I must say that my experience dealing with their live chat agent was less than desirable.

I asked them a question and wasn’t satisfied with the answer. I then asked a follow-up question, hoping for further clarification and the agent straight up ignored me for so long that I almost left the site.

Just when I was about to give up they returned to the live chat and from there things went smoothly. They were patient, informative and even provided me with a promo code for my first purchase.

WHAT ARE PEOPLE SAYING?

As a relatively new brand (they were established in 2018), Krizzurp Coffee hasn’t generated the sort of buzz typical of more tried and true vendors. One inquiry about them on Reddit resulted in a moderator urging users to avoid smoke shop brands and to only buy pure leaf from trusted suppliers.

That being said, their packaging bears detailed information and no additives are used in their powder. Customers get 100% pure kratom and nothing else.

BOTTOM LINE

With unique deals and resealable packages, there is plenty to recommend Krizzurp & Co. Their “coffee” is looking to be the next big thing in the kratom space. Starbucks this is not, Krizzurp Coffee is premium wild crafted speciosa just waiting to be sipped.

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